DRESSING THE DOG
Chapter 7 (Part One)
“If they could see me now, that little gang of mine,
I’m eating fancy chow and drinking fancy wine…”
– “Sweet Charity” (If They Could See Me Now)
My little friend Bri, and I were excited to be together in Paris, and at night, we would sit on the sofa and whisper our plans to one another – the things we wanted to see and do! On the other side of the room, Mummy and Ms. Sandra were making their own plans, and it didn’t take Bri and I long to figure out that ALL of their plans DID NOT include the two of us! I gave Mummy a snide look when their conversations became more obvious… like the part where Mummy said, “We’ll just leave the girls here and they can play with each other for the afternoon.” –SIGH- So far, we had accompanied them everywhere they went, so I wasn’t going to “act out” just yet. This wasn’t the hill I was willing to die on. I would wait and see how much time Bri and I were going to spend “playing together” before I set any plans in motion. For today, we had plans to explore the area around the Eiffel Tower and while our Mummies got ready, Bri and I snoozed on the sofa. Well, I snoozed. Bri, the chowhound, started looking around for something to eat and it wasn’t long before her efforts were rewarded. Tucked into the same cubby where my long lost lamb’s ear had been, was an unopened bag of dehydrated raw doggie snacks. They were some of my favorites and the bag was intended to last me the entire month… until Bri found it, tore it open like a savage and inhaled the entire bag. Well, that’s just swell. My snacks for the month, including my prized lamb’s ear were all gone. When Ms. Sandra walked in moments later and found Bri, again, licking her chops… the excitement in the room reached a fever pitch! Mummy and Ms. Sandra set about re-organizing the kitchen so that NO FOOD of any kind was within Bri’s reach. I sat on the sofa and wondered if I would have enough food left for the month, calculating out the two weeks that Bri would be staying with me. Where had Mummy put my REAL FOOD? My tummy was burning like ROME as I entered the first stages of starvation.
After the apartment was re-configured, we set out for the vastness of Paris, France. We had barely turned the corner when Bri had to potty. Well, honestly, she had just eaten a whole bag of snacks so I guess she DID need to go. I, on the other hand, was starving so I just stood and watched. RUH-ROH! Bri was having a little difficulty. This was not REGULAR poo and to make matters WORSE, she did her business right in the middle of a tiny sidewalk where other people were trying to walk. We were getting some nasty looks as a puddle of “liquid doggie snacks” pooled around poor Bri. YIKES… I hate to make this situation about MOI, but this was bringing back terrible “Katie memories.” How do I always find myself in these poo poo situations, and the poo poo isn’t even MINE??? Ms. Sandra quickly dumped her bottle of water onto the mess in an attempt to and wash away the evidence and clean off the sidewalk. After-all, we DO HAVE responsible doggie parents! But the second problem was that Bri had this long, flowing hair and the mess was dripping off her rear end… so there was THAT to contend with. She was too messy to be put into her carrying bag, too messy to hold and too messy/stinky to continue on. We took a few more steps while Mummy and Ms. Sandra had a frantic conversation regarding the course of action we needed to take at this point, when Bri needed to squat, AGAIN! OH BROTHER!!! I’m sure that she was re-thinking her decision to eat all of my doggie snacks at this point but sometimes… a dog makes her own bed and she just has to LIE. DOWN. ON IT! You know what I mean?
The only solution was to return to the apartment. Bri was not well enough to resume the activities planned for the day. Ms. Sandra gave her a cleansing bath while I hung out on the sofa with Mummy. That’s when I saw it… the most adorable stuffie toy in all of toyland. He was a cute little Frenchman of sorts, complete with a moustache and everything! It was Bri’s toy. She had brought him with her for the trip. I scooted a bit closer and took a few sniffs. Very gently I scooped him up in my mouth and inched back to my corner of the sofa, where I tucked “Mr. Moustache” under one leg and proclaimed him as MINE. Bri had eaten all my snacks for the month so I felt this was her way to apologize. And in all honesty, I hadn’t seen her really play with him. With me, he would have my undying love… FOREVER. After Bri was all cleaned up, our moms set about re-planning their day… and it involved leaving us at the apartment with Bri in a diaper! WHAAT?!?!?! My Paris life was sliding off the rails. Oh yeah, I was DEFINITELY keeping “Mr. Moustache.”
Bri recovered quickly from her intestinal issues and by the next day we were back on track. Now, it seemed, we would FINALLY get to see the Eiffel Tower! It was just down the street from our apartment so we could actually walk there. We stopped for lunch at “Carette’s,” Mummy’s favorite little café on Trocadero Circle. Little dogs were welcome everywhere in Paris and could either dine inside or outside at a little table on the patio. In the United States, we are forced to dine outside and our parents are always crying because they want to be INSIDE, but in PARIS, they wanted to be out in the lovely spring weather and “people watch.” On the outdoor patio, we also had a terrific view of the Eiffel Tower, so it was a win/win. Mummy always ordered the soup à l’oignon wherever she went and the soup at “Carette’s” was very good. Bread was served at every meal in Paris and Mummy always made sure to give me a few bits. People LOVE seeing well-behaved doggies at restaurants and we always had visitors stop by to say hello. Many of our fellow diners were Americans who would comment on how sad they were that they had left their own furbaby back home during their trip, not knowing how accommodating the city was regarding little dogs!
Of course, our little outfits were ALWAYS the talk of the conversation. While Ms. Sandra was visiting, I was wearing mostly things that she had made for me, since she was an ACTUAL DOGGIE DESIGNER! She made a few matching outfits for me and Bri and we felt pretty special when we hit the streets of Paris in those. (www.facebook.com/Chicka-Bow-Wow-Fashions-258322998962 ) After a while though, our moms would have to pick us up and put us back in their shoulder carriers because it took FOREVER to walk from one corner to the next due to being stopped every ten feet for someone to take our picture. At that rate, we would need a lot more than two weeks to see the city of Paris!!!
We finished lunch and headed to the Eiffel Tower, where we all just stopped and gasped in amazement! The intricate metal-work that makes up this historic landmark needs to be seen in person to truly be appreciated. We had barely made it onto the big square where the tower is located before we were approached by several young girls doing “surveys” of some type. We had already been forewarned that these are FAKE surveys done by gangs of ne’er-do-wells who, once you are distracted by the survey questions, will then help themselves to your belongings. (IE: wallet, purse, passport, little dog) YIKES!!! Mummy and Ms. Sandra just pushed them away and said NO! … and never even slowed down. Doggies were not allowed up onto the Eiffel Tower itself so we just viewed it from the ground. The lines to get onto the tower stretched out in all directions and our moms decided that they didn’t want to waste their time in Paris in a line like that… they could appreciate it from ground level! Off to the side of the tower was a park area with some benches and a few shade trees. It was the perfect potty location so we headed that way. As we sat on a bench, we watch a mime dressed all in white, set up his crate (he would stand on this) and put down a big bucket (this was for you to toss your coins). Hmmm, this looked very interesting. I had never seen a mime up close. Mummy told me they don’t talk… they just do a bunch of crazy movements. I was curious about this mime! I wanted to see him… to talk to him… to touch him! But that mime had plans of his own, and they didn’t include interacting with a little American Yorkie!
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